Where do we sit

We got to spend some time with two young boys last night - one aged 18 months and one aged 3 years old.

On the drive home, the husband asked 'just to know where we stand, do you think they were well behaved?'.

It's the first time we've really had a look at behaviours to try and determine what we think is appropriate and what is not. And it's interesting to have a think about what is or isn't acceptable, and why. And how would we change that.

For example, should they be up at 10pm?
Can we really critique that, having had a baby that goes to sleep on her own schedule, and that includes months of going to bed after that time? And they were visiting from out of state, so they were out of their normal environment...

And to what degree do you let kids do whatever they pretty much want, because they are kids?

And when you are at other peoples houses, should you come down harder on them?

And how do you make decisions about whether the child gets dessert, or has to finish their meal, or if and when they drink what?

I have many memories of going to my parents friends houses and getting the talk about being on our very best behaviour. I try to be on my better-than-usual behaviour when I am at other people's houses, and I would expect the same of my children - if not more! Children are more likely to be annoying or naughty than adults, so I think it's important from the get-go that your child understands this.

But then, how to implement that sort of thing!?